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NUMB #2
10:15 Jun 30 2005
Times Read: 451

I told you the story is still runing in my head, yes i did all i needed to do,all i could do,all i need to do..all i promised....



Now he should be happy knowing that i'm somewhere there and i know one day when we will look at the saim star i will feel numb, but this time from love to the feeling of " nothing" i my soul.



They wont me to love and to be happy,ok i will,i promise. i will be a perfect doll, a mate to play with, a stupid model # 767. then when they will get bored from me, i could dream about the perfect star in the rotten sky of my life, in wich i dont live for so long.



You should know how dose it feel to be rotten from inside and if you dont then i'm really happy for you, becous love and the feeling of being needed is good.but there is no need to be free then...



I could not belong go somebody, maybe because nobody really need me (the only people who really care about you are you family)... then when you know that the world inside you have no one inside,thet all the beautifull flowers are retten and the sky in no longer made from lsd (like in the bautifull dream)... you will dream about going back... but there is no exit...



All the people you loved are no longer here becouse you are not there anymore, so if you will really need to go, just GO... dont look back! and maybe somewhere there i will see you again... and maybe you will know who i'm ....



Now you live here, in the world of dead dreams and empty streets...



WELCOME I WAS HERE ALL THE TIME.

+++Hi and welcome every one who know me+++
23:23 Jun 29 2005
Times Read: 456

there is another day in my life,like the rain inside my soul i feel the summer wind in my face...

people are moving in circels and the try to fint the way into they'r dreams,which they never had...

the feeling of lost is in all of us, and no one can make it go away...maybe all i try to say is stupid, but i think i need to do something for people in the world, to make them be happy or...

i try and they dont let me to...so why do i live then?

Could you tell me?



Goog night



(sorry for mistakes)

IS IT ME?
22:48 Jun 24 2005
Times Read: 459



You need understanding.
In your life there has been many people that
could never seem too comprehend your
personality. Now you have either become an
out-cast because of their narrow minds or you
have adjusted yourself to them, and never
letting them see who you are deep inside. You
now think that no one will ever understand you
and you hate that fact. Though you are scared
of what the effects might be if you would
decide to let someone in so you keep a safe
distance that you both curse and bless.







this is alll i coud say ...

NUMB
13:53 Jun 07 2005
Times Read: 468

you never know what is goung on in your head?



well i think i can tell you.My head is empty when i go to my past...like feeling nothing.

There is a song "Game" Artist is Disturbed.i never knew,that they will sing out my pain.i never thought it will be really me who will try to be numb after all that hapend.



it's to dificult for me to tell who and when,i just know that my feeling are dead again.they never were so numb...i feel fear. i know that it's not right to be this way again,but again and again i'm going into deep underworld of my feelings.



he was the perfect one.the one you usualy dream about.the one you could kill if he ask you for that. maybe it was the true love... but i dont think so,it was just the pain that he and i felt at the saim time.he had some problems with the low and i helped him to feel beter.



i never did some dum thing that people sometimes do just to know they did it.like the words they say just to put a tick that they sad that.



So the story is not finished .but the feelings are numb and the gaim is just starting...